Adapting to the Challenges of Food Allergies

As I walked out of the allergist’s office recently with my daughter, I couldn’t help but reflect on how far we’ve come the last three years. My daughter still has a severe allergy to peanuts and tree nuts, but something has changed since her diagnosis in preschool. We have all somehow adapted to our new lifestyle. We are coping, and we are living our lives in a much more relaxed manner than we were at first. Despite our daily challenges, life is good.

I’ll never forget the day we found out about my daughter’s potentially life-threatening allergies. Even though I had suspected she was allergic to nuts, hearing the news officially left me feeling sad and powerless. I just wanted to crawl in a corner and cry.  As I sat there in the doctor’s office learning how to use an Epi-Pen, I felt like I was in a state of shock. The nurse explained that the Epi-Pen would buy us time to get to the hospital, in the event of a severe reaction. And for the first time, I realized the magnitude of my daughter’s diagnosis: she could die from this. I may need to save her life one day if she accidentally ingested nuts. Was I strong enough to handle this? How could I protect her when she was at school or away from home? How would our lives change?

After that day, our lives did change dramatically. No more birthday cake at parties. Halloween became a stressful event instead of a fun activity. Every party, every holiday, every vacation and every outing became a minefield that we were forced to carefully navigate. I knew we were taking a risk just by being out in public where food was served. Cross contamination can cause allergic reactions even with food items that don’t contain physical nuts. All it takes is a trace of an allergen to cause a reaction, which we witnessed first-hand on a few occasions. Epi-Pens and Benadryl had to be with us at all times. Grocery store visits became time-consuming because we now had to read every label, every time. My daughter couldn’t eat anything without checking all ingredients first.

Then came the day she went to school. As the bus pulled away, I felt a powerful sense of helplessness and sheer panic. My daughter would be eating in a lunchroom with kids who brought peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to school. And, I would no longer be there to protect her.

This was indeed a very scary and stressful time in our lives. However, over time, we became accustomed to our new way of living. My daughter became educated on her food allergies and often told friends, relatives and wait staff about them before I could even get the words out. She learned to never share food with others and to never eat anything without having a responsible adult carefully check the ingredient labels. I became skilled at recognizing allergy symptoms and treating them promptly. I quickly learned which restaurants were the safest for us to dine at. I also did a lot of research, so I could be knowledgeable and well-prepared for every situation. I successfully communicated with my daughter’s teachers to ensure they were aware of her allergies and knew what to do. And, thankfully, we have not had to use the Epi-Pen.

So although her allergies are still there, we have all become more confident and more knowledgeable about how to live good, safe and successful lives. We can once again go to parties, dine out and take vacations while enjoying these activities like we are supposed to. Our lives are no longer dominated by fear or helplessness. We are basically a normal, happy, healthy family. Through our challenges, we learned how to live again. It’s amazing how far we’ve come since those first scary days.

Sometimes our biggest challenges in life are some of our best opportunities for change and growth. Life may through us curve balls, but with time and practice we can learn to catch them.